a birth anniversary

dear friend, 

thanks for a lovely day celebrating my birth. i'm grateful i am here, too. 

a couple days ago i walked along the ridge during a rest from the rain. the yellow larch light held the whole long valley and i felt flooded with thanks for this life. it was a bittersweet remembering after struggling here for awhile. it is very powerful to know again: it is a gift to breathe.

sometimes when i don't write you it is because i don't know what else there is but loss.

other times, i am balancing earth house and stormwell with spinning. 

i have been thinking of you, your mementos talk to me from the altar. i've been enjoying this little life span tucked in-between bear hide and terracotta plants: me, eating cake batter in a diaper. me, shorn on the tip of the indian ocean. you, tipsy at 16. you, laughing so hard in my arms. a little jar of the gila river. our stone. all these good and tenders people-ing my life, making this life possible. 

thank you,

kate.